Sometimes a little laughter helps. The picture of your dad and you eating ripe figs brought back memories of one of my favorite scenes from I Claudius, when the evil Livia, who had smeared poison on the figs outside on the trees, turned to the doctor on Augustus' death bed, and demurely said as she swept out of the room, "By the way, don't eat the figs."
I'm thinking a little shared pizza might be a better choice!
Still praying, and just kidding,
Suzi