Ficus Nervosa - Sometimes referred to as Ficus Addictus.  A mental disorder and sometimes illness that comes with the entry into the Ficus Carica community.

Symptoms include worry concerning all things weather, appearance, and general condition of all shapes, forms, species, and cultivars of Ficus Carica.  It is indicated that recently infected individuals will seek comfort and advice from those with the terminal condition of this disease.

Condition will deteriorate with the individual buying several examples of Ficus Carica and attempting to propagate species that are extremely difficult even to those with advanced Ficus Nervosa.

The only cure for this condition is the passage of time where most infected individuals simply lose interest, or the death of the severely infected/addicted individual.

Copyrighted 2017

Bankruptcy due to over buying will do it too... I also assume that your "death of the severely infected/addicted individual" can either be due to natural causes or related to murder by the husband/wife/partner due to overspending habits by the afflicted victim

A adjunct disease known as "Ficustimealostous" often accompanies Ficus Nervosa, a disease in which great amounts of time are simply lost to the victim of this disease as they stare lovingly at their newly leafed out cuttings envisioning the plant a year or two in the future with scrumptious figs ready for the plucking.

Don't forget another major symptom - the inability to make planting decisions that is mysteriously compounded by the number of nodes on a cutting. This can lead to what might appear to be almost sociopathic tendencies to brutally cut a single cutting into its smallest 1-node parts and enshrining them in a cup, a baggie, a plastic bin, even outside in the ground and inside the refrigerator. Closets and bathrooms have been known to be used as makeshift mini-shrines to the fig. Family members who attempt intervention risk being cornered and lectured on cold-hardiness and fig wasps for hours. Tragic.

Yea, its killed my romance life with the ladies...LOL

Hilarious! And all true!

HEY! Knock it off guys...I RESEMBLE that (hehehe)

Nonsense, there is no such disease! Now I have to get back to my cuttings, I think one is leafing out -- I've been watching it all day